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A compendium of engineer-speak, engineering code phrases, and other assorted technobabble designed to obfuscate and/or baffle the non-engineer.

  • A number of different approaches are being tried.
    We have no clue and are trying things at random.
  • Preliminary operational tests were inconclusive.
    It failed the smoke test.
  • Test results were extremely gratifying.
    It didn't blow up, and we were very surprised.
  • The entire concept will have to be abandoned.
    The only person who understood the thing quit.
  • Teamwork is essential.
    Let's spread the blame as widely as possible.
  • I'd like your input on this.
    I'm looking for someone to take the fall for this project, and you look like a sucker.
  • The project has gone into alpha testing.
    It doesn't work, and it only blows up occasionally.
  • The project has gone into beta testing.
    It still doesn't work, but it no longer blow up (well, at least under "normal" conditions).
  • This is a new generation design.
    The old design didn't work, maybe this one will.
  • This product has been thoroughly field tested.
    We didn't have the proper test equeipment, so we shipped it and hoped the customers wouldn't blow it up.
  • Developed after years of intensive research.
    It was discovered by accident.
  • The design will be finalized in the next reporting period.
    We haven't started this job yet, but we've got to say something.
  • Hardware is done.
    It's software's fault.
  • Software is done.
    It's hardware's fault.
  • System is ready for delivery.
    We give up.

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